what i think, what i want, what i [don't] know

I've been readin The Iressistable Revolution by Shane Clairborne and well, I feel very much moved by the things he's done and things that The Simple Way [simpleway.org] has done and I think I'm going to find my way over there and do what I can to help out. I want to learn. I want to do something with my life that will mean something. Not to me, not to others, not to history, but to God. That'd be great. One of the things I also want to learn is to have that heart to just love. JUST LOVE. No technicalities like "maybe just a little bit, cause I mean, he killed a guy." JUST LOVE. In the [sometimes better said] words of Conor Oberst "No Lies, JUST LOVE" So I'll learn. I'll be tested and fail, and then it's back to square one. So that's my future (and what I've convinced myself to see, and my life can head a totally different direction... it's up to God) and I'm left wondering. How about now?


How about now? What shoudl I do?


My GOAL:Re present who Christ is [not was, but is] and share Him and His love with EVERYONE, not just who I think needs it, but EVERYONE. And not only that... but not brag about. Just Do It.

growing up or growing stupid?

I guess I kinda just had thought on wether we are born selfish into this world.. (among many other things) ... where all we really know is "me, me me me meeeeeee!!" and I guess our minds our set automatically in that manner cause I think I would be able to remember when I wanted something and had to beg for it. So babies... are they just born, with like automatic settings that they know when they are hungry and when they wantt o sleep ... or do they have a brain process? Huhh....... I guess the only thing that roots to all of this is... GOD! He makes us soo unique.. that some of us may remember things when we were young.. or even babies! and so we must have intellect when we are young... and as we grow older... we grow a little smarter no? We learn that there is more to the world than just us... and there's more to th world than just the world.. and there's more to that than something else... and then we are led to God (if don't already grow in a God-related family).. so we learn... and we learn.. some learn better/more/better than others ... so what does it come out to? trying to explain God? why try ? You can't explain God, which in itself is bigger than you, without first explaining yourself. And that in ITSELF is impossible... so are we really gaining any knowledge? or do we just gain wisdom? and which is better? which is given to us by God? .... hmmm.. interesting ....



Love Alain

copied and pasted from eastsideyouth...

it's weird... how things work out... and how God is always the root of what happens... He's really doing a number on me. What I mean by that is that this weekend I've been feeling very ... blank ... and unclear and boggled about everything... but I know I still stand by Him ... unfortunately I'm still pretty distant, but I'm trying my best (I guess, I'm not actually) to change that...My actions have been small but they were because of God... This morning during worship after communion I was facedown in prayer and worship.... I didn't realize it till after halfway through the next song... that I was alive and I hadn't moved... you when you're really really into your prayer that you forget about yourself and that you have a life and that if you let Him, God will make it the best peice of heaven that can reach Earth..... which is what I'm working on... He's broken me... THAT'S IT!!! That's what I have had happen to me.. He broke me... I just realized this.... wow... he's molding me, because He knows I want Him to lead me down a great path... and live for Him....even though I am not at all worthy of anything He has ever given me... I feel really satisfied and greatfull right now.... Man... this is rad...

Hmm...

I guess and introduction would be cool to post first. And even cooler for me to look at later.

My name is Alain.
I go to Eastside Christian Church. I live in the town of Disneyland. I enjoy hugs, rain, love, and music (not necessarily in that order). I also enjoy reading, photography, looking at pictures, finding God in everything. I was "made" in 1988, and I will be between the ages of 16 and 18 in less than a month. Well at the end of this one...

I hope whoever might read this enjoys it.

I also want to use this to extend prayer to anyone and everyone. about anything and eveything. So if you want you can e-mail me at in_keeping_the_secrets@yahoo.com

Thanks.

His,
Alain.

P.S.
Let me know if you read this, it'd be cool.